From the "Things That Keep Me Awake at Night" series:
Here is what I don't understand. Well, one of the many things I don't understand. Who came up with our people "classification" system? You know, the boxes we fill out on doctor's forms or scholarship forms. The choices are Native American, Pacific-Islander, Asian, White/Non-Hispanic, and Black. But how did we decide that the supposed "color" of someone's skin equivalent to their continent of origin? And why is it only this way for "black" and "white" people? I use quote marks because we lump all people from Africa into the black category even though people who hail from continents other than Africa can have darker skin and aren't called black. And what about people who were born and raised in Africa who have white skin? Are they African? Why does the term African-American automatically conjure images of black people? And what do they call black people in England? African-English? Or black? And why is white linked with non-Hispanic? Why don't I get to choose Irish-American, Scottish-American, or English-American? And what about people of Asian heritage who were born and raised in the United States? They are American. Right? Or are they Asian-American? See what I mean? Why do "black" people have to be called African-American? Why aren't they just American? Either everyone is hyphenated, or nobody is hyphenated. Either everyone is labeled by color, or nobody is labeled by color. Therefore, I have decided to be Purple-American. Why? Because purple is my favorite color, I was born in America, and this label makes as much sense as calling someone with brown skin black or someone who was born in Toledo, Asian.
I guess my point is, why does it matter? Why do we need those questions? Sure, certain diseases affect people of specific origins (for example, sickle-cell), but couldn't that be listed on an "Other Pertinent Information" section? Why is it that people are assumed "white" in articles and are only described when they are otherwise? You never hear "The victim, a 33-year-old white woman..." but you do hear, "The suspect, a 21-year-old black male..." Again, either everyone is described, or nobody is described, and we are described the same way. We could just randomly assign colors:
Asian-American could be green
European-American could be pink
African-American could be purple
South American-American could be red
Australian-American could be brown
North American-American (eh!) could be orange
Antarctican-American could be blue, because they are probably really cold
Why don't we just all go with the country where we were born? I'm American. Or, we can go with a huge list. I'm American with Irish, Scottish, and English ancestry, but since I am a Christian I believe that we really all originated in Africa soooo...I'm African. Wait, I'm African-American, right? But I'm white, so I can't be African-American...can I?
Yes, I know I am wandering into the realm of ridiculousness but am I anymore ridiculous than a "classification" system that thinks describing someone by the color of their skin or their country of origin explains who they really are?
Pig Nose
Aidan having fun at Great Country Farms.
Monday, November 7, 2011
Thankful, Day 7
Today, I am thankful for my friends. I know I wrote a post about my bestie, E, and for her I am grateful, but I am also blessed with an incredibly large web of friends, close and casual. Through Facebook I have reconnected with people I went to elementary school with -- I'm talking third grade here, people -- and former boyfriends and my college roommates. These people live across the country and even on other continents but while I was on bed rest, they reached out to me and provided support and laughter. They came from three states away to AEM's baby shower or just to visit after she was born. Throughout the years my friends have kept us afloat and though I always mean to say thank you (I win first place in the "Been Meaning To Mail Those Thank-You Cards But Never Got Around To It" contest) I don't ever feel like I express my gratitude enough. Thank you for the play dates, the gifts, the supportive posts, the trips to Subway, the trip to Disney, the wedding party, the movie tickets, the laughter, the prescription co-pays, the blankets for my kids from your family member I've never met, the hand-me-downs from your neighbor's neighbor that you grabbed for us because you knew we needed the clothes, and so much more.
Sunday, November 6, 2011
Thankful, Days 3, 4, 5, and 6
I know, I know. It's November 6th and I am four days behind. This should not surprise anyone who knows me and if you don't know me, learn quickly.
Day 3: My Laptop: It is a simple thing for most people, particularly around this area. Almost everyone I know has a laptop, the most recent iPhone, a Wii, giant flat screen TVs, etc. I have not had a laptop in years, since the last one I owned was somehow ruined by orange juice. This laptop was a gift from E's mom, who could have easily sold it when she upgraded. Instead, she let me have it and now I am able to sit and write, something I have been wanting to do for months. Thank you, S! You are kindness and generosity personified.
Day 4: My Daughter's Health: On November 4, AEM turned four months old. She was born four and a half weeks early and has been nothing but happy and healthy since her birth -- since her conception, really. The pregnancy was hell on me but AEM survived a ruptured placenta and emergency C-section to weigh in a six pounds and measure almost 19 inches (I can't imagine how big she would have been at full term!). She is a smart, silly, wonderful baby. We love her incredibly and can't imagine our lives without her. C and I were worried. We did not know if we had enough love in us or how we would love anyone like we love AAM, but we needn't have worried. AEM makes all of our hearts sing.
Day 5: Our House Hunt: After nearly seven years, a short-sale, tons of bills in collections, being on food stamps, WIC, and unemployment, and borrowing money left and right to survive, we are finally financially solvent enough to purchase a house and for that I am eternally thankful. It is truly the American dream, to have a place of our own for our children, to put down roots and give them a sense of permanence. We want our children to have the same friends from nursery school to nursing home. C moved year after year until he reached junior high and it affects him to this day. I moved once, in third grade, and never felt fully accepted. Our children will never have to endure what we did because we are blessed to be able to afford a house.
Day 6: Blade: Today, November 6, 2011, we put our dog Blade to sleep. He was 12 years old; C received him as a 21st birthday present, when Blade was a crazy, energetic dog who could leap onto the backs of couches or jump six-foot tall fences effortlessly. He loved to cuddle and C liked to carry him around like a baby, which was pretty funny given that Chris is 6'4''. He had the greatest grin and sweetest disposition; kids could pull on his ears and he wouldn't move, though as he got older he would look at us like, please, can't you do something here?, and he would move from couch to couch to avoid ear-tuggings. We will miss you, sweet doggy.
Day 3: My Laptop: It is a simple thing for most people, particularly around this area. Almost everyone I know has a laptop, the most recent iPhone, a Wii, giant flat screen TVs, etc. I have not had a laptop in years, since the last one I owned was somehow ruined by orange juice. This laptop was a gift from E's mom, who could have easily sold it when she upgraded. Instead, she let me have it and now I am able to sit and write, something I have been wanting to do for months. Thank you, S! You are kindness and generosity personified.
Day 4: My Daughter's Health: On November 4, AEM turned four months old. She was born four and a half weeks early and has been nothing but happy and healthy since her birth -- since her conception, really. The pregnancy was hell on me but AEM survived a ruptured placenta and emergency C-section to weigh in a six pounds and measure almost 19 inches (I can't imagine how big she would have been at full term!). She is a smart, silly, wonderful baby. We love her incredibly and can't imagine our lives without her. C and I were worried. We did not know if we had enough love in us or how we would love anyone like we love AAM, but we needn't have worried. AEM makes all of our hearts sing.
Day 5: Our House Hunt: After nearly seven years, a short-sale, tons of bills in collections, being on food stamps, WIC, and unemployment, and borrowing money left and right to survive, we are finally financially solvent enough to purchase a house and for that I am eternally thankful. It is truly the American dream, to have a place of our own for our children, to put down roots and give them a sense of permanence. We want our children to have the same friends from nursery school to nursing home. C moved year after year until he reached junior high and it affects him to this day. I moved once, in third grade, and never felt fully accepted. Our children will never have to endure what we did because we are blessed to be able to afford a house.
Day 6: Blade: Today, November 6, 2011, we put our dog Blade to sleep. He was 12 years old; C received him as a 21st birthday present, when Blade was a crazy, energetic dog who could leap onto the backs of couches or jump six-foot tall fences effortlessly. He loved to cuddle and C liked to carry him around like a baby, which was pretty funny given that Chris is 6'4''. He had the greatest grin and sweetest disposition; kids could pull on his ears and he wouldn't move, though as he got older he would look at us like, please, can't you do something here?, and he would move from couch to couch to avoid ear-tuggings. We will miss you, sweet doggy.
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
Thirty Days of Thankful -- Day 1 and 2
It is November, the time of year where we try to be more cognizant of the thing for which we are thankful. We should, of course, be thankful every day but who has time for that? Because I only stole this idea from someone's Facebook post last night, I am combining Thankful Days 1 and 2 in this post.
1. My Family. Yes, predictable. Yes, expected. But it is true. I am blessed with an amazingly supportive husband who has suffered by my side for almost seven years and given me two wonderful children. He endures my mood swings, my self-criticism, my insecurities, my nagging demands, and my excuses for avoiding sex. He makes me laugh and he tells me I am beautiful. My children are insanely funny and sweet and love me far more than I deserve. My son draws me pictures of "Love Robots" and my baby girl greets me at three a.m. with the biggest, gummiest smiles possible. For these reasons and a billion more, I am thankful for my family.
2. My Best Friend. A girl who has a best friend is one of the luckiest girls in the world. I don't have a sister and I don't have much of an extended family but I do have a best friend. She endures many of the same things as my husband, minus the sex-avoiding excuses, and still wants to hang out. She loves my children as her own. She gives me clothes that don't fit her and helps me with makeup and does my hair for me. She comforts me when I make stupid mistakes and tells the truth without judging me. She drives out of her way twice a week to bring me food and clean my house when I am on pregnancy-induced bed rest. There are not enough things I can write to express how amazing she is. When I picture myself old and sitting on a porch in a rocking chair, I picture her by my side. We will have outlived our husbands and will be still raising hell wherever we are, shopping, going to movies, and riding the Tilt-A-Whirl. I love you, E!
1. My Family. Yes, predictable. Yes, expected. But it is true. I am blessed with an amazingly supportive husband who has suffered by my side for almost seven years and given me two wonderful children. He endures my mood swings, my self-criticism, my insecurities, my nagging demands, and my excuses for avoiding sex. He makes me laugh and he tells me I am beautiful. My children are insanely funny and sweet and love me far more than I deserve. My son draws me pictures of "Love Robots" and my baby girl greets me at three a.m. with the biggest, gummiest smiles possible. For these reasons and a billion more, I am thankful for my family.
2. My Best Friend. A girl who has a best friend is one of the luckiest girls in the world. I don't have a sister and I don't have much of an extended family but I do have a best friend. She endures many of the same things as my husband, minus the sex-avoiding excuses, and still wants to hang out. She loves my children as her own. She gives me clothes that don't fit her and helps me with makeup and does my hair for me. She comforts me when I make stupid mistakes and tells the truth without judging me. She drives out of her way twice a week to bring me food and clean my house when I am on pregnancy-induced bed rest. There are not enough things I can write to express how amazing she is. When I picture myself old and sitting on a porch in a rocking chair, I picture her by my side. We will have outlived our husbands and will be still raising hell wherever we are, shopping, going to movies, and riding the Tilt-A-Whirl. I love you, E!
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